Why I Wasn't Surprised by Miley

I try to keep my finger on the pulse of YA culture. What are teenagers doing these days? What and how are they thinking? What do they like and dislike? How do they talk? What is important to them? I've been a teacher for several years, so observing them has been pretty easy, and even though I'm no longer teaching full time, I'm still teaching a creative writing course and keeping in touch with my students. As a YA novelist, I think it's very important to keep up with "what the kids are doing." A couple of things this week have made me rather thoughtful about YA culture, especially from the perspective of someone who writes for a YA audience, so I figured my blog was as good a place as any to ruminate on them.

I wasn't surprised by Miley Cyrus's performance at the VMAs. While everybody else seems to be sounding off in shock, awe, dismay, and disbelief, I watched the performance (for the record, not live, but on YouTube) and thought to myself, "Yep, that seems about right." I don't mean that sentiment in any sort of condoning sense. It was vulgar, and the use of children's motifs in sexual ways ought to disturb and infuriate anyone with any sense of morality. What I mean by it is that Miley Cyrus merely followed her pop star trajectory to its logical conclusion - self obsessed, convinced of her own perfection, impulse driven, and hyper sexualized. These things are the markers of YA culture at its worst, and they feed and are fed by the natural inclination of all young people to be self absorbed. These are also all the things I have kicked back against in my writing for young people. Along those lines, I found a great article this week that perfectly articulates what I try to do when I write my books. It's a very short article and worth a read (click HERE), but the gist of it is that young people need to be encouraged to look outside of themselves and to see that they aren't the center of their own little worlds, but rather they are participants in a world much bigger than themselves. I love this quotation from the text: "One way to display a higher opinion of children than the popular fashion is to address them as members of the human family and not as a special class of self-worshiping mirror-gazers." (Zach Franzen, "Get Children Outside - Of Themselves). I will always try to drive this point home in my stories, no matter what I am writing. I don't keep my finger on the pulse of YA culture so I can regurgitate back to them what they already believe and are doing, I do it so I can know how to encourage them to be better people. It is important for young people to know they each have unique, God-given gifts and abilities, and that they are important as individuals, but concurrent with this, they need to be encouraged to focus not just on themselves and how they can make their own lives better, but on others and how they can use their gifts and talents to serve other people. I try to avoid doing this didactically, but it should be clear in all my currently published books that selfish behavior results (ultimately) in bad things happening. If this is a message we can drive home to our youth, perhaps we'll have fewer Miley Cyrus's running around in the future. 

*For the record, I should note that I don't in any way believe it is only young people who are inclined to selfishness - it is a malady, rather, of humankind. I'm merely addressing young people since they are my target audience. Furthermore, I believe that young people, more so than adults, have a much greater capacity for great acts of love, heroism, and kindness. What I see in young people is the potential for great good and for great evil, and also a great potential to change. This is why I think children's and YA literature is so important - because it addresses the formulative years when almost anything is possible. 

Multiple Personality Disorder?

This fall I will find myself in a unique position - a position in which I have never been before. I will be working on two novels simultaneously! Wait, wait, wait, some of you are thinking right now, aren't you always working on multiple ideas at a time? To be sure, yes, but I've never seriously worked on two novels at once. It's one thing to gather ideas and take notes, it's another thing entirely to sit down and write to a deadline, and that's what I'm going to be doing. I have to say, I'm relishing the challenge, although I'm also wondering if, in the end, I'll feel plagued with multiple personality disorder. Authors tend to get so immersed in their writing that they become their characters, or at least one of them, so working on two novels with two very different protagonists and two very different story concepts is going to be interesting. The first book, and the one that will obviously take precedence, is the last book in The Gateway Chronicles, The Bone Whistle. The second book, due shortly after the manuscript for The Bone Whistle is due, is Breeder, the first book in my upcoming dystopian trilogy. So an added challenge here is that I will be pulling all the pieces together on one series while putting all the pieces out on the next. I think it's going to feel a bit like playing two games of chess at the same time - one I'm just in the process of winning, and one I'm just starting to play. The Bone Whistle, too, is contemporary fantasy adventure, while Breeder is futuristic dystopian romance with a touch of science fiction. Aside from the speculative nature of both mixed genres, these books are going to be very different! Not to mention that I'm playing around with the idea of writing Breeder in first person present tense, and The Bone Whistle, as with all the books in The Gateway Chronicles, is in third person limited omniscient past tense. Multiple personality disorder indeed. But truly, I am looking forward to it. I think it will be a treat to be able to go back and forth between stories and characters, and I think it will help my brain to stay elastic, as it were. A brain that is never challenged grows stagnant over time!

Some of you who have been following my adventures for a while may be wondering how I can possibly have the time to write two novels at a time this fall. Well, I'm happy to announce that I'm making the leap to full time author! I will no longer be teaching history at my school, although I am retaining just one creative writing course. I will always have a passion for bringing young people along in their writing endeavors, so teaching creative writing just three hours a week is an important thing for me to continue doing. Aside from that, I will be caring for my boys at home, writing, promoting, traveling, and speaking, and I think it's going to be wonderful! And yes, I do have time to write two novels.

Don't forget to mark your calendars for the release of The Scroll on October 17th! I've been finished with it for so long that I can hardly believe you all haven't read it yet! To whet your appetite, here's a little sneak peak:

Perry began to deal the cards, acting indifferent. “Hearts, everyone? Someone will need to be on a team.”

“I’ll team with Darcy,” Sam said. “I’m terrible at this game.”

Darcy felt a stab of annoyance. She was ultra-competitive at cards and hated being on a team with anyone. Still, she knew she shouldn’t be so uncharitable toward her best friend.

“You do this every year . . . by yourself?” Darcy asked as Perry continued to deal.

“Yep. Helps me to wind down.”

“You know what doesn’t help me to wind down?” Dean said, and his tone of voice caused them all to look up. Dean lifted his chin toward the window and stood.

Darcy looked out the window and followed suit so fast her chair skittered out behind her and fell over.

Colin Mackaby stood on the other side with his nose almost flattened against the screen. The light from the dining hall reflected eerily off his eyes and washed his face in a pale yellow light.

Sam gasped and backed all the way up to the wall, clutching at Darcy to keep upright.

Colin stared at them without moving, and then he smiled and turned to walk away.

“Oh no he doesn’t!” Perry threw his cards down and charged out of the wing and to the patio door. The sound of Perry smashing into the crash bar echoed in the dining hall. Dean was fast on Perry’s heels, and Darcy and Lewis followed, dragging Sam with them.

They caught up to Perry behind the lodge, just off the patio. He had Colin backed up against the side of the building, his forearm jammed beneath Colin’s chin and his other arm cocked out, fist ready.

“Stop!” Darcy threw her hands out and caught each of them with her magic, forcing them apart.

Perry stumbled backward, looking affronted, and Colin slid a few inches down the wall, never taking his eyes off Perry. He seemed unsurprised that Darcy could perform her magic at Cedar Cove now.

“You broke my sword!” Perry shouted at Colin. “And you tried to give Darcy to Tselloch. She should have let Liontari kill you, you worthless piece of—”

“Perry, stop it!” Darcy shoved him hard. “You’re not helping anything.”

“You should listen to her,” Colin said.

Perry made to lunge at Colin again, but Dean held him back.

“You have no idea what you’re dealing with,” Colin said. He looked at each of them in turn. “It amazes me, how in the dark Pateros keeps you.”

“If you know so much, why don’t you enlighten us?” Dean said.

“You don’t even know how a gateway is formed,” Colin said, continuing as though Dean hadn’t spoken.

“And I suppose you do?” Darcy asked, trying to keep her voice level.

“Wouldn’t you like to know?”

“Yeah, I would, actually.”

“Darcy,” Sam said. “I don’t think this is the best way to learn—”

Darcy shook her off. “We need to know, both for Alitheia and for here. If he knows how, maybe he can help us.”

“Why would he help us? He’s working with Tselloch. He’s obviously trying to help Tselloch take over this world as well as Alitheia,” Lewis said.

“He doesn’t know anything,” Dean said. “He just wants us to think he does.”

“Of course I do! I’m part of it.” Colin’s expression became manic. “I’m more a part of it than any of you ever will be. I’m destined to rule Alitheia, not Darcy, not any of you, I—”

“Colin, Tselloch fed me that lie, too—”

“It’s not a lie!” he screamed, and spit flew from his mouth.

“Darcy saved your life,” Sam said, speaking soothingly. “Twice. She’s trying to help you.”

“She’s trying to help herself.”

Darcy huffed and rolled her eyes. There didn’t seem to be any way of breaking through to him.

“You shouldn’t judge her,” Sam said, pointing at Colin.

“If I wanted advice from a dumb blonde, I would have asked for it.”

Perry broke free of Dean’s grip and punched Colin across the face. Colin’s head recoiled against the siding, then he ducked so Perry’s second fist struck the side of the building instead. He crouched, spun, and leapt onto Perry’s back before throwing an arm around Perry’s neck and bringing Perry to his knees with a chokehold. Dean leapt forward and grappled with Colin’s shoulders.

“Do something!” Sam shouted and grabbed Darcy’s arm.

“I can’t if you’re holding on to me like that!” Darcy wriggled out of Sam’s grasp.

“What’s going on out here?” an adult shouted across the grounds.

“Help, please!” Sam waved her arms.

A flashlight clicked on and two men ran their direction. “Boys, break it up! Boys!”

Perry shoved up with his legs and slammed Colin against the side of the building. Colin let out a sharp exhalation of pain, and Dean pried his arms off Perry’s neck and pinned them to his sides. Perry spun, coughing and gasping, and punched Colin across the face again.

“Stop, Perry.” Sam grabbed his wrist as he wound back again. “Dean’s got him. He’s done.” 

Once Upon a Time

I actively watch very few television shows on a regular basis. The only show I can remember setting out to watch from the pilot episode (based on the excellent marketing and Spielberg's attachment to the project) is Falling Skies, and that's been a very fun experience, although the special effects are at times cringe-worthy (which is why I avoid the SyFy channel like the plague.) But for a couple years now I've heard people talk about the show Once Upon a Time, and I've always had a mild interest in checking it out. After all, fairy tales are right up my alley! Well, my husband and I finally got Netflix and lo and behold, there was Once Upon a Time.

I watched the pilot episode and was immediately hooked. Needless to say, it's been a little bit of a productivity killer this week, BUT I can view it as research for my writing (right? Sure, why not.). The fairy tale side of the show is, truthfully, a bit cheesy, a bit tongue-in-cheek, and while I usually despise cheesiness, for some reason I don't mind it in this show. So that put me in a contemplative mood.


Why don't I mind that the evil queen is so over-the-top evil? Why don't I mind the love-at-first-sight cliches, the magical solution to every problem, and the obvious story outcomes perpetrated by over-the-top writing, acting, and costumery? I think the answer lies in the very fact that these things are what fairy tales are all about. In Cinderella, Snow White, and Sleeping Beauty, you're not supposed to wonder who is good and who is evil. Heroes and heroines are pure of heart and ready to love, often demonstrated by dashing displays of selflessness and friendly animal companionship. Villains hate everyone and everything that doesn't further their own agenda and drive for power. They are Machiavellian to the extreme, and they relish death and destruction. Except for in fairy tale revisionist stories, there is no place for the "misunderstood" villain that is so prevalent in our postmodern society in traditional fairy tales ... and I love this! Fairy tales draw a clear distinction between good and evil, and when they are transformed into a visual medium, you can literally see it. For children, and for those of us who sometimes yearn for things to just be cut and dry from time to time, this is a beautiful thing. There is obviously also a time in fantasy (and in all literature) for a not-so-obvious distinction between good and evil. In my opinion this is only appropriate if the purpose is not to blur the lines in actuality, but to make the reader dig deeper to figure it out for themselves. In fact, this makes for much more complex forms of storytelling than one finds in the traditional fairy tale, so I'm not saying doing things one way is better than doing things the other way. Where I think the show Once Upon a Time has really hit it on the nose is that the over-the-top obvious morality of the fairy tale realm is tempered by a more subtle figure-it-out morality of the "real world" setting of Storybrooke, Maine. Where the evil queen is SO EVIL in the fairy tale realm, in Storybrooke she's much more seductive and sly; at times the viewer almost wants to feel bad for her (before she hauls off and does something wicked again to remind you who she really is). I think the end result of the show is one that shows both sides of evil - how sometimes it is obvious, and sometimes it is not, and you need to be on guard against it regardless. It engages the cerebral and the emotional centers of the brain.

Mostly, I think I love fairy tales because all fantasy literature is essentially an offshoot of traditional fairy tales. Modern fantasy authors, in using fantasy, have the same ability to draw distinct contrast between good and evil, and to do so in a way that takes the reader to the extreme moral highs and lows without it seeming out of place in the real world (because, after all, it's *just* a story!). To quote a scholar on the subject, "Fantasy literature takes us out of our world, enabling us to see moral principles more clearly... In addition, fantasy literature gives us more stark examples of heroism and villainy than realistic fiction usually does." (Cole Matson, "Is Tolkien Useless?") These stark examples can encourage us to be better people than we are. After all, who ever roots for the evil queen?

Book 5 Cover Reveal!

I am super excited to reveal the cover for book 5 of The Gateway Chronicles: The Scroll and to tell you a little about it! So, without further ado, here it is:

The creature on the front is a wyvern dragon, and you may not be able to tell because of the color that was added and the realism of the image, but it was actually sculpted for me by my friend and talented artist Julia Hankins. She then took a digital picture of it, and we sent it off to my cover designer, Megan Dooley, who put color to it and designed the rest of the cover. This dragon's name is Marier in the story, and I look forward to you meeting him!

You can go to my page at TWCS here to recommend The Scroll on Facebook and/or Goodreads and to read the BACK COVER SUMMARY! Do it now! :)

That Ooey Gooey Feeling

There is something euphoric about starting a new book. And of course I'm talking about writing a new book, not reading a new book. For many of you, I realize that picking up a new book to read can also produce a sense of euphoria, and I have felt that from time to time myself (if the author is a tried and true favorite), but the sense I'm talking about with writing a new book is much stronger. It's like an ooey gooey feeling deep in my chest and gut that produces uncontrollable grins, fits of giggles, and (if I'm not careful) childish hand-clapping. It's really a rather embarrassing syndrome, now that I think about it, but thankfully the discipline of being an author is one mostly practiced in privacy, so giggle and clap away, I say! Last night, as I began writing book 6, I was not in private, however, so my anticipatory energy had to be contained to leg-bobbing and subtle wiggles. I'd been meaning to start book 6 for weeks, but due to a number of circumstances, I hadn't quite gotten around to it yet, and as many authors will tell you, starting is the hardest part, so sometimes it takes a little push to get things going. Well, kids were in bed, and hubs had a new Xbox game to try out last night, so I hopped in the car and drove down to our local Starbucks where I settled in with a frap and The Piano Guys pumping through my ear buds. I was motivated! I was ready. to. go. But truthfully, I didn't get much done at Starbucks. About 30 minutes into my endeavor, the shop was invaded by about twenty junior-high cheerleaders, all wearing pink, and all chattering away. Cheerleading and the color pink. Two things guaranteed to kill my enthusiasm for pretty much anything. I tried not to let my glower show too deeply on my face, but it was nigh impossible to get anything done for the fifteen minutes it took all of them to order, collect their orders, and head out to the patio. And by that time, Starbucks was about to close, so I packed things up and headed home. But it was not an entirely wasted effort, because in that time, I had gotten my word document all set up and formatted, my notes somewhat organized, and I'd even written the first paragraph of my prologue. (Whoa . . . I know. Just let that awesomeness sink in for a moment . . .) But most importantly, I'd gotten my head in the game. Driving home, I came to the realization that I needed to scrap and/or move the single paragraph I'd written in favor of a much better idea for the prologue (this did elicit grins, giggles, and hand-clapping, but I was stopped at a red light, so it was okay), and I began to map out the rest of what would follow from there. Adam wasn't quite finished with his Halo level on Xbox when I got home, and I was so full of that ooey gooey excitement, that I slapped on some workout clothes and ran circles around my neighborhood until my energy was somewhat abated and I had the rest of the prologue solidified. Yes, yes, it was very late to be out running, but it was either that or climb the walls, and honestly, when you are an author who sits on your bum all day (or night in my case) writing, a little exercise is a good idea! Plus, I was a security guard once upon a time, and I kind of pity the guy who tries to mug me. But I digress. Anyhow, back inside, I got changed, returned to Scribbus (my computer) at about midnight, and knocked out roughly 1200 words. So I'm happy to announce that book 6 is off the ground! And I'm even more happy to announce the title for book 6, which I've been sitting on for three years. Drumroll please... book 6, the final installment of The Gateway Chronicles, is called, The Bone Whistle. Yay! If you follow me on twitter (@kbhoyle_author), ask me questions about book 6 using hashtag #TheBoneWhistle, or about book 5 with hashtag #TheScroll or #SaveTellius. I'll answer whatever I can!

And now, to help you feel properly excited, here is a teeny-tiny teaser from upcoming book 5, The Scroll:

Don’t let him deceive you, he said. I am doing everything to Tellius you think I am, and more. Tselloch straightened from the banister and stepped toward her so his height became that much more impressive. Every day that passes, he grows weaker.

“You-you promised to give us until the first day of spring!” Darcy said. She tried to step back, but her feet were rooted to the spot. She clenched her hand around her ring, but the coldness asserted itself with greater intensity.

And I shall, but it will not be easy for him. 

"There and Back Again"...

...The Beauty of Ring Composition in Life and Literature.

As you know if you read my previous blog post, when I was in Sydney, Australia a couple weeks ago for the Sydney Writer's Festival, I had the opportunity to speak with a 9th-grade literature class regarding my books and how I write them. I ended up speaking primarily about literary alchemy, but I started the discussion with ring composition. Ring composition, otherwise known as chiasmic/chiastic structure, is an ancient literary device named for the Greek letter Chi: X in which a poem, passage, or entire text builds up to a central point (what I usually call the axis when I am teaching it to students) and then builds down to the conclusion, stressing the same points in the reverse order. So, for example, the text could look like this:

A (beginning)
          B
                    C
                              D(middle/central point of the story)
                              D
                    C
          B
A (conclusion)

Or:
                              A (middle/central point of story)
                    D                 D
          C                                     C
                    B                 B
         (beginning) AA (conclusion)

And there are other variations. In my books, I tend to follow the second example I gave, but the basic principle is the same - the second half of the story mirrors the first half of the story either by comparison or contrast (ie. D2 could either mirror D1 or be a reverse echo of D1).

Okay, this is all getting a bit technical, so let me get down to the why of the matter. Why bother doing this at all? This is what one of the students in the class asked me, and it is more than a valid question, in fact it is at the heart of it all. Doesn't this make for a lot of work? Isn't writing just about self expression? Isn't it more important that I just get words on the page? Stop! You're stifling me with your compositional restrictions! The answer to these questions, in order, is: Yes. No. Kind of. Let me explain...

I don't think any serious writers want their works to be irrelevant, and in order to prevent irrelevancy, one must take steps to write works that subconsciously lodge themselves in the reader's brain. Ring composition is one way to do that, and it is tried and true. It is subconscious for the reader because, unless they are purposefully studying the text to look for it, they won't see it, but they will feel it. The human brain responds to patterns, and especially to repetition and mirroring, so if you use a chiasmus in your writing, it lodges your story more firmly in the long-term memory of the brain, and if you've written a good story, it should end up being something that readers relate more easily to and want to go back to for more. But yes, it makes for a lot of work! In fact, it's down right hard to do. Many a sleepless night have I spent pacing my living room, trying to puzzle through how to make this structure work with my stories, but in the end, it is always worth it (and it's gotten me out of more than a few writer's-block binds!). Besides, anything worth doing ought to be difficult in some degree. Who ever said rewarding work should be easy? And no, writing is not just about self expression, and if you use a structure like ring composition, you can ensure that your work goes beyond you and hopefully becomes something that is relevant not just for you and your time, but for others and times to come. How do I know this? Let me name a few of the texts that have utilized ring composition throughout the ages and let the examples speak for themselves: The Histories, Beowulf, the works of Aristotle, the Bible, Dante's Inferno, all the works of Shakespeare, Aquinas's Summa Theologica, The Lord of the Rings, The Hobbit, The Chronicles of Narnia, Alice in Wonderland, Harry Potter, and many more. And yes, while it is important for a writer to "just get words on the page," it is also important for a writer to think about the order in which those words will be presented. All literature is instructive; all authors have some point to make. Ring composition can help you make that point subconsciously without wasting your words.

There are other benefits to using ring composition beyond what I have already mentioned. It lends a sense of purpose, permanence, and completion to a text or story. Have you ever read a book that, if it were a building, it would look like a Jenga tower with odds and ends sticking out here and there, dangerously close to falling over? I have, and usually these sorts of stories feel unfinished or unsatisfying when I get to the end, and I'm left with dangling story elements that were never resolved. I usually chalk this up to poor, or no, planning on the part of the author, and I rarely return to these stories for a second read. If you successfully use ring composition, this should never happen in your own work. Your story will not only make a point, it will lodge in the readers' brains, and when it's finished, it will feel finished. Lastly, ring composition imitates real life and the journeys that all of us take. I thought about this as I was winging my way over the Pacific Ocean coming back from Australia. The same journey, in reverse order, that I took only a week before. When I got back to the Dallas airport and waited for my connection to Birmingham, I even saw some of the same security personnel I had encountered on my way out. This may seem trite to you, but it put a contemplative smile on my face as I pondered its relevance to my writing, and to the greater story of life (ashes to ashes, dust to dust, naked from my mother's womb and naked I return, etc...). There is something beautiful to me about the chiastic structure in life and literature, and it will always be a structure I come back to in my writing. After all, who isn't moved by the deeper implications behind Tolkien's simple words? "There and Back Again." 

Sometimes the Journey of 10,000 Miles...

...Ends in Australia! Or, however many miles it is from Alabama to Sydney, Australia. I don't really know, and I'm too lazy to look it up right now. I'm sitting in a beautiful mansion in the suburbs of Sydney, listening to the gentle bubbling of a fountain and softly playing music, thinking about how amazing it is that my little fantasy series has landed me here. This week at the Sydney Writer's Festival has been a fun mishmash of literary events and sightseeing. On the literary end of things, I got to attend the opening address for the festival which featured a famous storyteller named Daniel Morden (see a video of him here), the after party (during which I spent a lot of time looking around and thinking, "This is SO outside my comfort zone!"), a morning coffee shop event where I got to talk about my books and do a little Q&A, an open bar event where I got to network with other people staying in the hotel (and, incidentally, also got to talk with Daniel Morden and take a photo with him - he's very down to earth and friendly), and I'm looking forward to my panel tomorrow morning at which I will be up on stage with a couple different authors discussing fantasy as a crossover genre. Despite all the swanky parties, gourmet food, literary celebrities, and Festival events I've taken part in this week, though, my favorite literary "event" I've gotten to participate in has been something not connected with the Festival at all. I got to visit a local private school and take over a literature class for a period. Once we got through the introductions and the natural skepticism that attends any classroom visitor/guest speaker (hey, I'm a school teacher too, I know how it goes!), I had a blast talking with the students about my books, my experiences as a writer, and the importance of writing meaningful literature. I introduced a couple devices for infusing meaning into your writing, using Harry Potter as the example (I can hear some of you intellectual snobs out there huffing and thumbing your nose at me, but you just need to get over it). The beauty of discussing Harry Potter is that it is a story that almost all the kids have read and loved, so it's really a common ground. One of the Seven Laws of the Teacher is to speak the language of the students, and that is one way in which to do it. Anyhow, being in a classroom full of students is about the best place I can be, and I feel so blessed to have been able to fly all the way over here to talk with them. Even if that was the only thing I did all week, it would have made the trip worth it. And apparently Australian teenagers are quite tickled by cursive handwriting...

On the sightseeing end of things, our hotel sits just beneath Harbor Bridge, and the Opera House is just up the bay behind it. I've familiarized myself with the historic road in this area called George Street and have enjoyed walking around, trying not to look too much like a tourist. I've seen just about every famous animal associated with Australia, although mostly in captivity (yes, mostly. There really are some enormous spiders here). I have resisted the urge to follow the seagulls around going "Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine.", but I could not resist the urge to giggle like a small child riding the 30-foot swells across the mouth of Sydney Harbor. I have hugged a koala bear, I have boxed a kangaroo, I have played in the tide pools and *tried* to find the Little Penguins on the beach (which I could hear, but not see). I have not, however, tried Vegemite, and I'm thinking I'm okay with that. I've climbed a lighthouse, eaten fish and chips on the beach (yes, not very exotic I realize, but I ate them on the beach looking at the cliffs on either side of the mouth of Sydney Harbor), eaten at the oldest pub in Sydney (the Fortune of War, est. in the 1800s), and watched sharks and stingrays swim over my head in an underground aquarium. Did you know stingrays could get up to, like, ten feet across? I had no idea.

Overall, I've had a blast, and the trip is not over yet. My talk is tomorrow, we have a wine tasting event tomorrow, and I have a few more souveniers to buy before we leave on Monday. I do miss my family, however, and I am looking forward to getting home and hugging my boys.